As you can see…I have not changed the formatting of the blog yet…it will happen, I just don’t know when. Today, instead, I worked on the newest latex design. Yep, I have finally come up with an idea. I’m pretty happy with how it is coming out so far. It’s a lot of work, though, a lot of pieces to it, but I enjoy the end result of things like that. They feel so much more personal when I am able to put more work into them. The easy stuff is nice and all, but I really enjoy the more complex pieces. There is a different sense of accomplishment when I finish them. I take pride in all the stuff I do, and I always want what I do to look nice…it’s just that the more complex and difficult projects just feel better at the end. I really don’t think I explained that very well. I’m having a bit of a conundrum, though…I have a wig that I made that would match, but I’m not sure if that will be over kill for the photoshoot (when it happens) or if I should play it up as over the top. Guess I will figure out when the time actually comes. Oh man! I just realized I’ll be able to pair it with some pieces from other designs I have. Oh wow…this design just became so much more fun, and it isn’t even finished yet. I love when that happens.

The formatting on my last post definitely didn’t come out right. I have corrected it, but it made me realize I need to rethink the design of my blog. I noticed it isn’t easy to read when it isn’t formatted, but it also isn’t all that great to read when it is. I was going to try and work on it tonight…but as I kept just staring at the computer screen…I realized tonight was not going to happen. My brain is apparently not in the coding frame of mind. Isn’t it crazy how we have to be in the right mood or even just the right frame of mind to be able to do certain tasks. If I’m not feeling creative, I can’t draw or come up with a design to save my life…when I am feeling creative, I sometimes can’t stop the ideas from almost overwhelming me. If I’m in the mood to work on computer stuff, such as coding, I can spend all day long working on it without even noticing I’ve been sitting there for hours, if I’m not in that frame of mind I fidget and think of all the things I could be doing rather than what it is I’m supposed to be doing. Isn’t it also crazy how we could be at home, with no desire to work on anything even if the whole day is available for the task…yet as soon as we are at work all we want to do is all the stuff we didn’t do at home. It’s fascinating how our minds work sometimes. I find it funny, personally, that I can go from being super lazy, where I don’t even want to get off the couch to grab a glass of water…to being so hard working I forget to even stop to drink. I don’t seem to have much of an in between…and I’ve met other people like that. It’s hard to find that middle ground between work and relaxation…maybe that’s why I do it in extremes…it’s the only way I know how to even start to try to balance it out.

Trying to write this, tonight, using my iPad… not an easy endeavor and I’m not sure the formatting will be correct… but we shall see. I’m really happy to say I’ve been getting positive feedback on my latest design and the latest shoot. I’m really happy about that! I’ve picked up some more followers in Instagram and I think that is amazing. I just need to keep up the trend. I’m still trying to figure out what I want to make next. I have so many options for what I can do, and just haven’t figured out what the right path is yet. I’m hoping it will come to me soon, but it feels slightly like a continued case of the artists block I’ve had for a while. Hopefully it’s not and something will come to me soon. The great thing about inspiration, is it usually comes unbidden and at a random time, so I’m sure it will strike me when the time is right. I just hope it doesn’t wait too long for that to happen. I do have a new fabric dress in the works…it is cut out and just needs to be sewn together…but I haven’t decided what I want to do with latex yet. It will come to me in time. I just did a preview of this post… so far it wasn’t a good sign as to how it will look…but I’m going to go ahead and post it, and will have to fix the format once I am at a computer again, so bear with me and I hope it isn’t too bad.

Today was a good day. It was long, but productive and busy. Someone who’s opinion is very important to me, also saw my newest photoshoot and liked the pictures, so that made me feel pretty good. Was a much needed boost after the comment from a couple days ago. I know they aren’t perfect, I still have a lot to learn, and a lot o pay attention to, but I feel like I am improving, and in the end I think that’s what matters. That I haven’t given up and I keep trying to get better. Photography is definitely not my passion, but it is becoming a lot more fun since I have a better idea of what I’m doing and the photos are starting to come out nicer without needing lots and lots of editing. Its so easy to want to just give up once things get hard, and to let a lack of understanding and skill be an excuse to stop. But it is so much more rewarding to keep going, even if you only have a few small wins on the way. Those small wins can mean so much more than a big loss. They give hope. They show us that we are truly heading in the right direction, and as we keep going, those little wins become bigger wins and happen more frequently, until we finally hit the goal we are wanting to reach. The only thing to be wary of is letting yourself become complacent or give in to the fails. And you don’t want to be content with hitting just one goal. Once you’ve hit that goal, set the next goal for yourself. Keep striving to be better, or do better, and always keep learning. Learning is what keeps us young. It reminds us of school and being children where each new day had new ideas and concepts, and new adventures. Learning allows us to broaden our horizons and keeps us open minded towards new ideas and possibilities. Learning is one of life’s gifts. Without it, things would be stagnant, and boring…nothing would ever change and no one would ever grow. That would be a dull and sad world.

I didn’t get a ton of stuff accomplished today. At least not as much as I probably should have, but oh well. I did manage to finally post photos on here of the last photoshoot. And also posted photos from the most current photoshoots. That means the website, for the most part, is caught up. Took me long enough. Also was able to get more stuff posted to the etsy site, and posted another photo on instagram. So I guess today was actually a little more productive than I thought. It was one of those off days though, where you just don’t know what you want to do. You try to do one thing, and it doesn’t feel right or you can’t get in to it, so you try to do something else, and just keep going through things until you finally just settle on something, and even then, end up doing other things while doing whatever it is you settled on. Just couldn’t pin point what I wanted to do with the day, so I turned it into a somewhat relax and recharge day. Always good things to have. I can start back up with productivity tomorrow.

I really love Sundays. I’m able to get so much accomplished on them. I was able to complete a photoshoot today! I’m really happy with how it came out…even though I had a comment that shook my confidence. I’m still pretty happy with the outcome…at least I’m trying to be. I struggle with self esteem issues…which I’m learning is something almost every female I know has issues with in some form or another. So I’m trying to push past the shy and awkward me to get my stuff seen. It’s hard to find models to work with because my schedule is so crazy all the time that it’s hard to make plans and hard for any one else’s schedule to match up. So I do the best with what I have. I figure it’s a start, and it is all leading in the right direction. Plus, I’m getting better with camera settings :). Oh look, another smiley face made it into a post! They just seem to fit certain sentences, lol. Now that this design is photographed, I have to start working on the next one. And eventually get this one…and the previous one… posted. I haven’t forgotten that detail…just haven’t had time. I guess there isn’t much point in taking the photos if I don’t do anything with them though, is there? Maybe this week I can get them all posted on here. For now…here is a sneak preview!

So you know how, sometimes, if you aren’t careful, its easy to miss the last step on a ladder. Whether its a really tall ladder, or a little step ladder? Well…I did that today. Yep, missed that last step and hit the ground pretty hard. I didn’t completely fall, but it jarred me…I didn’t realize how much until my back started hurting…and let me just say, it is very unhappy with me. I’m glad I was able to catch myself and not actually fall in to anything…and I’m sure the look on my face was absolutely priceless. I’m sure I’ll be laughing about it once the pain goes away. Such a silly mistake, and I’m usually so careful on ladders…for that exact reason. Oh well. I was able to accomplish my mission, so at the end of the day I consider that a win. The irony comes when I remembered last night’s post was about dancing…and tonight’s post proves that I don’t have the grace and balance of a dancer at all, lol. Maybe dancing lessons wouldn’t be the safest thing for me to do. Then again, maybe they would make me safer. 50/50 chance. Could also do some weird combination of both. Who knows.

Two days in a row I titled before posting! Yay! I watched two movies today that cracked me up more than I expected them to…Keeping up with the Jones’ and This Means War. They both had me cracking up pretty hard, and I really enjoyed the story lines. Just fun movies to watch when you need a little pick me up. Although, one of my favorite movies for that is Pitch Perfect…that one always cheers me up. And Burlesque…I really like movies about singing and dancing. I think it’s because I’m not really very good at either of those two things, but love trying to do them anyway. I think it would be a lot of fun to learn how to ball room dance, but it looks really difficult (to master) and I just don’t have the time right now for that kind of an extracurricular activity. Fun to dream though. And fun to dance around the living room or my studio like a crazy person when a good song comes on. I’m sure if anyone actually saw them, they would think I was having a fit of some sort, or wonder if I was possessed by something. It isn’t a pretty sight. But it is fun none the less.